7 Tips I Have Learned
About Connecting with My Purpose for Writing My Memoir
By: Kathleen Pooler
“Say what you have to say, not
what you ought to.” Henry
David Thoreau
Memoir is a slice of
life told as a story. It has a transformative power for both the writer and the
reader. I want to invite my reader into my experience in a way that connects
them with their own experiences.
In order to do that, I have to connect with my
own purpose for writing my story.
Everyone has a story
to tell, but not everyone feels the need to write about it. Or maybe they don’t
feel they have a story worth telling.
I think it starts with
believing we have a story to tell.
Like many others,
although I have felt for years I have a book inside me, I did not become clear
on my intention for writing it until I found my story.
I had to write my way to my
purpose… many years of
journaling, four years of taking writing classes, writing vignettes, going to
conferences and hours of pondering and shooing away my inner critic.
The story that begged to be told
revealed itself to me over time and through many hours of doubts and detours.
I’d put it aside for
weeks at a time, then feel the nudge to revisit it, each time digging a little
deeper. The story was always with me.
Through two rounds
of professional developmental edits and two rounds of beta readers, my story is
being shaped and polished before sending it to a copy editor.
It’s kind of like
cleaning the house in preparation for the cleaning lady.
Through it all, I
can say, I have connected to my purpose for writing.
Once I became clear
on why I wanted to write my story, I was able to develop a deep connection to
it. Consequently it has guided me in my writing.
If I am clear, the
reader will be clear. I can dig deeper and speak from deep within.
Connecting with my story, the
only one I can tell, allows me to believe I have a story to tell.
Here are 7 tips I
have learned about connecting to my purpose:
1. I have to find ways to get
past my inner critic.
You know, the one who says:
·
What makes you think anyone will want to read
your story?
·
Your story isn’t unique.
·
You can’t write that well anyway.
·
Who cares?
I had to put my
inner critic in her place. Her name is Gertrude.
Here’s how
I did it by writing out a dialogue with her
2. I need to show up and write
on a schedule.
Sometimes just the
act of writing words unlocks the creative juices:
·
Free write- helps when I’m stuck. Writing words even if they don’t make sense.
·
Journal- writing thoughts, feelings, and reactions helps me to clarify
and focus.
3. I need to trust in the
process.
Sometimes when I
start to write, I have no idea how the story will unfold. I may start in the
middle and if I let the writing flow, I eventually find the beginning and end.
After I show up, I
need to get out the way of the story and let the words flow. I can go back and
change later.
4. Connecting with my purpose
helped me to identify the main themes of my story.
When I connected
with the purpose for writing and found the heart of my story, I was able to
identify the themes to shape my story around.
This made it easier
to stay true to the themes, which became the foundation for the story structure.
5. Taking time to pause and
think has helped me be clear on my purpose.
This has helped me
to tap into memories and make connections about their meaning from my adult
perspective. Sometimes my best ideas flow when I take time to walk in the
garden or sit in church.
As writers know, we
really are working when we’re staring out the window.
6. I need to keep my overall
purpose in mind as I revise.
If I am clear on my
main message and the audience I am targeting, I can approach suggestions from
editors and beta readers with a sense of purpose, staying true to my story
while remaining open to constructive feedback.
7. Connecting with my purpose
for writing has been my guiding light and is helping me get to the finish line:
I am taking the time
to write
it right because I do believe that I have a story to tell and that I am
the only one who can tell it.
How about you? Do you feel
connecting with your purpose for writing has helped guide you?
She
blogs weekly at her Memoir Writer’s Journey blog: http://krpooler.com
and can be found on Twitter @kathypooler
and on LinkedIn,
Google+, Goodreads and Facebook: Kathleen Pooler
One of her stories “The Stone on the
Shore” is published in the anthology: “The
Woman I’ve Become: 37 Women Share Their Journeys From Toxic Relationships
to Self-Empowerment” by Pat LaPointe, 2012.
Another story: “Choices and Chances”
is published in the mini-anthology: “My Gutsy Story”
by Sonia Marsh, 2012.
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Thank you , Paul. I appreciate the opportunity to be your guest today!
ReplyDeleteKathy, I feel like I've traveled some distance of this path with you, albeit vicariously via your blog. I have no doubt that you've written your memoir with absolute integrity. I look forward to reading it. Best of luck, Belinda.
ReplyDeleteIt surely does take a village to write a memoir and I am thrilled we have traveled this road together, Belinda! Thanks for your ongoing encouragement and support. I appreciate you stopping by to comment.
ReplyDeleteOh Kathy, you've given me a list for so many aspects of my life. Thank you (again).
ReplyDelete