Penguins Are Killers

Most people think that little black and white penguins are cute, friendly, fish-eating mammals. You are wrong! We have underestimated the evilness of these ferocious creatures.

Did you know you are 68% likely to die from a bite of a penguin? You are also 27% likely to die from a slap from a penguin’s flipper. Finally, you are 46% likely to die from being belly-flopped by a waddle of penguins. In total, that’s a 137% chance of being killed by a penguin – pretty nasty odds.

The only way to protect yourself is to tell everybody of these terrible statistics so that they stay away from penguins. If you see a penguin crawling on its belly – don’t be deceived. It’s a trap. The waddle will overwhelm you.

Please pass on this message to all your Facebook and Twitter friends. The only way to survive a potential penguin attack is to be prepared. Are you?